Monday, August 31, 2009

Happy Birthday!



Three years ago today, a woman in China was headed off to work in the morning.  She took the road that leads up to the back of the orphanage where she worked.  There along the road, placed so he would be seen, was a small Bundle of Joy who was 1 day old.  He was wrapped in a red cotton jacket and swaddled in a quilt.  The woman picked him up and took him with her to her job at the orphanage, where she knew he would be well cared for.
The woman's name is Zhao Shu Ping, and the little package she found was our little Caleb at one day old, waiting there to be found.
Caleb turned three yesterday.  He is currently playing with a new toy rescue station that he got as a gift, and he and his dad are putting it together.  He's been going to preschool for the last week and it's been going very well (although just today I learned that he had to sit in the Safe Chair because he was hitting other students....).  I'm still amazed all the time at what a great kid he is.  We couldn't have known what we were in for....yet he is so happy and thriving now.
I'm so thankful for that Hand that stayed with him while he sat there on that road 3 years ago.  A vulnerable newborn that could have been found by anyone, but he went to the right place.  
It may have been his birthday yesterday, but Russ and I are the ones who got the best gift.

Saturday, August 15, 2009

We are DTC

There has been an amazing turn of events in the last few days regarding our paperwork.  Let me pose a question here: does anyone believe that acting faithfully toward something ends up producing positive results?  For instance, I was debating my post about our new son, Li.  Specifically, I was wondering whether I should post at all or wait longer, say, closer to the time that our paperwork got to China.  At least I could say that we were that much closer to this little boy.  But, I didn't wait.  Even as I wrote it, our paperwork sat in Washington DC (or so I believed), but I assumed it would move.  I told our news anyway, hoping that said paperwork would be moving soon.  I published the post, went to a birthday party, and didn't think about it for several hours.  At 10pm, I decided to check Fedex (not obsessively at all) to see if it was all still sitting at the Chinese embassy in Washington DC.  Before my eyes....I saw, no it was not! It was being sent back to Oregon where our agency is located.  The next day, Oregon notified us that our paperwork would be on it's way to China on Friday, August 14th.  Yesterday.  We are DTC.

DTC stands for "Dossier to China", the "dossier" being another fancy word for paperwork.  Stuff we have gathered for 6 months.  Stuff that was signed, notarized, copied, certified, authenticated, etc, etc, etc.  Replaceable, yes, but not without another significant amount of work.  Not without making our new son wait even further while we fixed things.  So, thankfully, thankfully, we can say we are DTC!  Now what?  Oh yeah, we continue to wait.  More news will be added when it comes, I guess.
On another note, I found myself in a situation a couple of days ago where I had to stop and consider my own behavior.  I don't mind doing this, except sometimes it makes me feel bad because I realize that I was probably not acting the best.  Anyway, Caleb and I went to the bank to deposit some money and it was a different branch than I had been to before, as we were on the other side of town.  While the woman behind the counter was processing the transaction, she said to me, "do you mind if I ask you something?  Is he yours?"  (Referring to Caleb).  For anyone who has read past posts-- I  have mentioned situations about people putting their feet in their mouths, or maybe just being plain rude about this.  There have been multiple interactions that I have never mentioned at all.  So, politely or not, when someone asks me such a question, it gets my hackles raised.  I can't help it.  So, I answered "uh, yeah," in a semi-snotty/not that friendly of a way.  Already defensive.  And she answered, "oh!  I was just wondering because I have 4 adopted children from Korea!"  And then she proceeded to ask me about our agency, gave me information about a local group specifically for adopted kids and their families, etc, etc, while I halfway hung my head in shame.  The truth is, sometimes, I am simply a big, fat jerk. Sometimes, people just ask because they care or they have something in common.  Sometimes, people are just being NICE.  Quite a concept, I know.  
So, from now on, I'm going to be trying a little harder to give the benefit of the doubt.  Get over my extra sensitivity to a subject that isn't always a big deal.  Remember that many people are very nice.  (But still keep my handy comebacks, just in case).
And, speaking of nice, we are so appreciative of all the kind words and good wishes received from everyone about this process and our boys.  Thank you!  It means a lot to us that so many people care and are there to show their support in this.  And I will be happy to respond in a very positive way back by showing pictures and continuing to write about it all.  All in a very nice way.
 But, of course, you already knew that.

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

It's A...

At what stage of gestation does a person announce a pregnancy?


I think it varies depending on whose opinion you are seeking. I have known people who have told me they were expecting almost immediately after finding out themselves. Others wait a while before saying anything. I even once worked with someone who hid her pregnancy so well that when she finally told me, she said something like, "by the way, I'm pregnant and my due date is this Sunday."
So, there are all kinds. I'm sure that people tell or do not tell based on their experience and maybe some fears. A new child joining a family must be announced in its own way. I do not share in the pregnancy issue. But, I have wondered when it is "safe" to announce our new child and who they are. When we were matched with Caleb, we basically hung up the phone from talking to our agency, spent a few minutes jumping up and down, and then picked up the phone again and started calling people to tell them about our son (see post from July 27, 2007). We were so ecstatic that we could not wait to start telling people. We finally had a person to tell about! Fast forward eight months to March 11, 2008. The day we actually left for China to get Caleb. The process is so long. Different from a pregnancy at least in the fact that most people can assume it will be about 9 months. Adoption varies. Referral times vary. Travel approval, paperwork, everything can take it's own sweet time regardless of if there is a child waiting on the other side or not. Waiting definitely isn't my strong suit. I really struggled last time because, many times I doubted the process and how long it was all taking. Additionally, it was difficult to also have to defend that same process for those who didn't understand and wanted to complain about it. But I can't overlook those who celebrated with us in our wait and helped us along every step of the way.
So, here it is. I face the same struggle. I have good news. I am announcing it today, but I still don't know how long it will be until we see China again. Our paperwork is still in Washington DC, for Pete's sake. But, we have news all the same that I'm ready to announce and face the wait again.

It's a boy!

We've been matched with a little boy who is waiting for us in China as we speak! His Chinese name is Li Ji De and he is almost 11 months old. He has a cleft lip and palate that have been repaired. We had told our agency that we would interested in adopting another child with the same condition as Caleb, since we have the experience already. We had also said we would be open to either a boy or a girl, and this is our boy! He is currently living in an orphanage in Shantou City in Guangdong, China. We are so excited to meet him and ready for him to join our family!

Meet Caleb's little brother...


6 months (March 2009)



9 months (June 2009)

I'm coming to the USA !


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