We're home!

It is so good to be home.  I don't think I was aware of how much I really wanted to come back until we actually arrived at our house.  I'm sure that it could have also been partly because of our very long trip to get here.  Thankfully, it is over now.  A brief synopsis:

      Get up at 4am to fly from Guangzhou to Beijing.  It's a 3 hour flight that Caleb sleeps through. 4 hour layover in Beijing that I thought would be long and boring, but was actually spent with another adoptive family, trying only to find terminal 2.  We manage to make it onto the 2nd flight, Beijing to Newark.  It's a 13 hour flight and Caleb barely sleeps at all.  Besides being incredibly long, it's not exactly dull.  There is vomiting, tears, an argument between 2 passengers across the aisle from us that required flight attendant intervention, me trying to clean up the floor of the airplane restroom because Caleb peed everywhere, more tears (by me), and a request by the airline staff for help from any medical personnel on the flight because someone was ill.  I volunteered after I realized no one else was saying anything.  I should have mentioned right away that I was a pediatric nurse, so I wasn't sure how much I could do.  The whole time, I kept thinking, "what if they have to land the plane?  Where are we going to land? We're flying over the North Pole!"  Fortunately, I was trumped by a Chinese doctor on board and didn't have to do anything.  We arrive in Newark and spend almost 3 hours standing in line, going through customs, finding and rechecking our luggage, etc.  At this point, I am aware that I have limits to what I can endure while traveling, and I believe I have reached it.  But we still had another flight ahead: Newark to Omaha, 3 more hours.  Caleb and Russ sleep and it is peaceful.  We arrive at the airport and are greeted by both my family and Russ' family.  I happily go to bed at 3am, so relieved that it is all over.

Caleb is adjusting nicely to home, although to him, it may just be one more place that he'll stay with us for a little while before moving on.  It's the 3rd bed he's slept in since he's been with us.  The sleeping thing is probably the biggest issue, as we are all still jet lagged, and he really doesn't appreciate the crib yet.  Getting to sleep is OK.  Staying asleep is another story entirely. Sometimes, he just sleeps wherever, I guess.

We went to visit my parents the next day to meet the rest of my family.  We were also reunited with Owen.  It was so good to see him!  He stayed with my parents and probably became somewhat of a spoiled granddog, but that's OK, I suppose.  I wasn't sure how Caleb was going to react to him, but it was all right.  He was a little shy at first, but by the next day, he was totally infatuated with Owen, and wanted to feed him.  The feeling wasn't exactly mutual.  Owen merely tolerated Caleb for a while, but then, after being hand-fed his breakfast for 45 minutes, he really warmed up.

Russ goes back to work tomorrow, so I will be on my own all day.  I hope I can handle it.  We have a doctor appointment on Friday where we'll do the initial visit/workup thing and then see about making plans for Caleb's palate repair.  I think they did an amazing job on his lip already, so hopefully the palate repair will go just as well.

We've been receiving a lot of phone calls and well wishes from family and friends and we really appreciate all of the support that has been given.  Our dear friends even left a full refrigerator for us to find when we got home.  We walked in the door to find fruit, snacks, meat, milk, and even diapers.  It was great!  We are so thankful to be home, see everyone, and know that so many have been following our journey along the way.

From China...part 2

It's hard to believe that we go home the day after tomorrow. In so many ways, I am ready. It will be nice to stop living out of a suitcase and settle back into life at home. I can't wait to see everybody and have them meet our son.

More pictures from this past week:

This is from the area we were in last week, or closer to the area where Caleb is from. We traveled to Wuwei for a day to see his orphanage and I took this along the way.

Caleb says good-bye to a stuffed figure in the lobby of our hotel in Lanzhou. The day before we left, these large figures showed up, promoting the 2008 Beijing Olympics.

Just this evening, I was talking with another mom of a cleft child about being overprepared for this. It's true: I was expecting to have to mash his food or break out a blender to puree everything for him. But the truth is, the kid eats everything you put in front of him. What I didn't need were the special cleft bottles, Nuk nursers, and Playtex liners. I also threw one sippy cup into the suitcase before we left. It's the only thing he will drink out of at all, so it gets washed repeatedly (someone pointed out that sippy cups are made in China, but not used here). Yeah, it's the only one I've got. The other bottles, well, someone in the orphanage will hopefully now get good use out of them as they've been donated to a better cause.

We arrived in Guangzhou late Friday night and it is so different from the Gansu province that we came from. For one thing, it's humid. It actually rains at times. We spent Easter Sunday outside with the rest of the town because it was such a nice day.

Today we had a meeting with all of the families at the White Swan hotel (kind of the "main" hotel in this town where a lot of adoptive parents stay) to go over what was happening at the consulate in preparation for our return home. All of our paperwork was approved without any issues, and tomorrow there will be a swearing-in ceremony. Caleb will receive his visa and will officially become a US citizen when the plane lands. The tradition here is to take a picture of the babies on the famous "red couch" of the hotel (ok, maybe just famous in the China adoption realm). The kids can be dressed in traditional Chinese attire, so we found a regal little suit for Caleb to wear.

We'll be coming home soon everybody! See you then!

Gotcha!

Ni hao?!

Our little guy is here!

We've actually been with him a week now, but due to internet issues and first-time parenting, I've not been able to post anything. We arrived in Guangzhou last night after spending 6 days in Lanzhou, which is Caleb's province.

We had toured Beijing for a couple of days and on Sunday, flew to Lanzhou, about a 2 hour flight. Our plan was to get settled in to our hotel and we would meet the babies on Monday at the civil affairs office. That was our first mistake: we actually planned something. Things never seem to go as planned, do they? After arriving in Lanzhou and getting off the plane, getting our bags, meeting our guide, and getting on the bus, we headed for our hotel. As soon as the bus started, our guide told us that we would not be meeting the babies on Monday. Instead, our Gotcha day was to be that day instead! They would be brought to our hotel sometime around 3pm. I looked at the clock: 1:30, with an hour drive ahead of us to the hotel. We would just be getting there and our kids would arrive soon after! Russ and I were a little stunned, to say the least:

After recovering from the initial shock, panic set in. How many gifts for the officials do we bring? Which suitcase did we pack them in? What toys should we bring with us to the meeting room? What paperwork is necessary?

We reached the hotel and ran to our rooms to put gifts together and gather stuff we needed. I was so nervous! It was a strange thought that Caleb was so close by, he's always been there in pictures and dreams, but now to meet him in person! I wondered what his personality would be like, would he be traumatized by everything? Will he like us? The questions were endless in my mind. We went to the designated meeting room where the other families were waiting, too. After a few moments, a man came in and announced that the babies had arrived. The nannies came into the room with the kids, and I saw Caleb right away. I saw those eyes...straight out of his pictures. He was smaller than I imagined. He looked little and vulnerable, clinging to his nanny and looking around at everyone. We were so excited. The nannies took the kids and sat with them on their laps for a few minutes, since none of them seemed to eager to go straight to their new parents. Everyone was a little shy at first, and then, my little boy jumped down from his nanny's lap and toddled toward the waiting group with a smile on his face! He was so friendly, and so busy, just into everything in that room while we spent a few minutes getting to know him and signing papers.

The next day, we went to the civil affairs office to finish the paper work and he is officially ours! I guess we can't send him back now, huh? Who would want to? This little guy has so much personality and spunk. It is a lot of energy to keep up with, but he's doing great!

So, we have spent the last week in Lanzhou at the hotel and around the town some, getting used to being a family. It is very strange, the mix of culture and humanity in this country. It is unlike anything I've ever been exposed to. While driving, in one lane of traffic there is a rickshaw, right next to a Land Rover. Street markets have vendors selling traditional food, clothing, and spices sitting outside a coffee shop with an internet cafe. The architecture of one building on the street will have traditional/ancient Chinese decor and it will be next to a hotel covered in Vegas-style lights. Very interesting, all of it.

We spent a day travelling to see the orphanage were Caleb is from. Even though he was in foster care for much of his life, he still was closely associated with the orphanage in his hometown and probably went back at least once a month for a check up. The orphanage was four hours from Lanzhou, and when we arrived, we were warmly welcomed. We felt very honored to be there, as there are not very many families who return to visit. We had lunch with the directors and were able to tour the grounds and see some of the kids. It was very emotional. The assistant director took us to the very spot where Caleb was found as a newborn, on a road near the orphanage. She was actually the very person who found him. What an honor to be able to meet her! It's so strange to think back to that day, only 18 months ago. I remember what I was doing during that time, and it was not planning to go to China to adopt a little boy. It's amazing to think that God knew, even on that very day, that we would one day be standing in that spot.

There is so much more to say, so I'll have to keep adding posts and pictures. We are excited to come home, but we are here until Thursday, finishing up the consulate stuff. Tomorrow we are going to take more pictures of Guangzhou, which is entirely different from where we just came from.

Take care everyone!

From China...

So, we've made it here. As I write this, we are sitting in an internet cafe on the streets of Beijing. We arrived after about 24 hours of travel--I guess a couple days ago, it's hard to tell, really. I think it was Thursday afternoon. We're about 13 hours ahead of home, CDT. Our flight was looooong, but we arrived safely. I think I watched Enchanted at least 3 times, as it was one of the only in-flight movies available. Not bad.

There are three other families with us, which is great. These are families that are adopting through our agency, and we have been communicating with some of them since we have been DTC. Two of the families are here on their 2nd adoption, and we've gotten some great advice on this whole thing. There is so much that can be unexpected that I appreciate any help that I can get.

Highlights: yesterday, we walked past Tiananmen Square but were not able to go closer than across the street, as it is not open to the public at this time. We walked through the Forbidden City, which is enormous. Quite a bit of history there. I think one of the best parts of the day was taking a rickshaw into the hutong neighborhood, which is an older area of homes throughout some narrow streets and alleys (actually, the rickshaw ride was cool, but the driving here overall is, uh, uncomfortably close). Anyway, we took a rickshaw to a local family's home for lunch, which was delicious. We enjoyed meeting the local people in addition to doing all of the "touristy" things.

Today we visited a jade factory where I think a clerk was hitting on me. He was actually just trying to make a sale, I'm sure. I think the line went something like, "you look like an actress I saw in a movie this weekend, uh, I can't remember her name, though. You're beautiful," until Russ pointed out that I was his wife. He replied "you are very handsome, too!" He got the sale.

We also went to the Great Wall, which was amazing. My legs are still feeling the climb, but it was so worth it!

It is such a fascinating place to be: the people, the food, the culture in general is so very different to that which we are accustomed to. I am trying to soak much of it in so that we will be able to relay this someday to our son.

Speaking of our son, we meet him the day after tomorrow! Tomorrow we will fly to Lanzhou, about 700 miles from here. We are scheduled to actually meet him on Monday, but have been told to prepare for anything. He could be brought to the hotel tomorrow after we arrive, who knows.

I am going to attempt to add some pictures here, but I don't know if it will work. I'm actually unable to see the entry after it has been posted, so we'll see what happens. Here goes!Russ at the Forbidden City

Rickshaw ride

The Great Wall!

Yesssss!

I used to be pretty good at filling everyone in of what's been going on. But then, a few months ago, there was more to say. We had milestones and we made progress. The past couple of months have been mostly just waiting with not much new to report.
Until....
this week!
We received our travel approval this week! We are going! And, we're going soon! Suddenly, I don't feel ready. How can that be? Haven't I had more than enough time to prepare for this? It's true that things have been coming together, but it still feels like some things are still....out there. Unfinished. Incomplete. And they probably will never get done until absolutely necessary. I will still be reading parenting books on the plane ride over.
Here's what I think I'm mostly nervous about: he's a toddler. I can't escape some of the irony of the fact that I've spent 8 years working as a nurse for newborns, and yet I'm not getting one. I'm getting someone who is beyond my stage of understanding. I mean, I'm not totally clueless, but what exactly do toddlers do? I babysat my niece last week, who is a year older than Caleb, and it wasn't too bad. We put together the same puzzle 3 times. She helped me feed Owen, and then, when those first 12 minutes were over, we went to Home Depot because I didn't know what else to do. We spent a great deal of time checking out the carpet samples there and opening and closing every single drawer in the kitchen cabinet department seemed very entertaining. Is this my future?
It's going to be OK. As much as I have nerves, I also have a ton of excitement. And, of course, love for my little guy who I haven't even met yet. Life is seriously going to change. So what?


P.S. When I said we were leaving soon, I meant to say March 12th. As in, like, 12 days from today. I think I forgot to mention that part.

The wait goes on...

Guest author: Russ
I am not much of a writer, so I'll make it brief.
The long winter continues.
We are still awaiting final travel approval from China.
The wait is getting tougher. The anticipation grows.

Below are lyrics to a song by Chris Rice that reflects our hearts right now.

Cause I just wanna be with You
I just want this waiting to be over
I just want to be with You
And it helps to know the Day is getting closer

Every minute takes an hour
Every inch feels like a mile
Til I won't have to imagine
And I finally get to see You smile

The most depressing day of the year?

Ok, so here's what I was not doing this past weekend, but it's still a nice picture to look at anyway. A year ago, we were in Mexico, staying in a suite with a view of the beach, we had a hammock on our balcony, and these were my feet. It was January, it was in the 80's, and it was pre-adoption. Coming up on February 2nd is our one year mark of this journey, but it all seems to have gone pretty fast.
Instead of being in Mexico today, I am at home. It is 12 degrees outside with a light snow. Russ and I spent Saturday night at the Leid Lodge in picturesque, small-town, Nebraska (it was my new thing for the week). It was lovely: a lot of timber and fireplaces, that whole log cabin feel. Being January, it was very cold outside with a lot of snow on the ground. Over dinner, I sort of pretended that we were some place much further away instead of 45 minutes from home. Hey, it isn't Mexico, but I had to be somewhere, I guess. I think we just needed a little time away to do something different, but to also escape the everyday realities around here. Maybe everyone needs that from time to time. Today I went to a meeting at work (my old job, not the new one) and was asked no less than 5 times about our adoption process, all within a span of only a few minutes. On my own, I can deal with being childless and trying to process an international adoption that feels like it is taking 100 years. It's just when I am bombarded with questions about it and the answer is always the same that it starts to bug me. The bright outlook that I started the day with is lessened somehow. I know. I shouldn't let it get to me. And people are only asking because they care. I simply want, one of these days, to have a different answer. I want the answer to be that, yes, I do know something! Am I harping on this? I do know that I have some friends that have heard me speak of this enough. They now approach me tentatively, with a pained look on their face, almost a grimace, perhaps. Then, they slowly come out with "is it OK if I ask....?" I know they do not want to offend. I don't think there are many people who do. It's just hard sometimes, that's all.
P.S. This is a downer post! Maybe, it should just be disregarded after reading, or maybe it fits: I heard on the news that today was considered by researchers to be The Most Depressing Day of the Year. Well, tomorrow is a new day....

Trying something new

These days, I'm quite aware of the post-holiday letdown. January probably isn't anyone's favorite month, really. By the time January 10th has rolled around, we are all well into the cold days and gray skies. Our Christmas decorations are down and I've already lost track of what my New Year's resolutions were. The beginning of this new year has promised to be a little difficult for us. I'm not complaining, just stating that it's hard to know what and how long we are waiting anymore. Today's count since DTC: 62 days. Not too bad.
This week has actually gone quite fast with some new and interesting things happening. I believe it is actually a good start to 2008. After I recovered from my New Year's Day flu (literally, the flu, not a hangover as it may sound), I did try to get some new ideas into my head. I have decided that, in 2008, I would like to start trying new things. This isn't a New Year's resolution, it's more like re-shaping my way of thinking. I really would like to start trying new things that might be challenging, fun, or even scary. The point is that it is new. And I'm going to try at least one new thing/activity every week. Do I sound idealistic? I don't care. I may drop this whole idea by mid-February, but for now, it's kind of fun to come up with new ideas. They don't even have to be big, just something to illicit that sense of newness instead of the feeling of same-old. I'm not sure what each week will bring, but I envision some future plans that could include skydiving and maybe Tae Kwon Do lessons?
Last week, we started off in a simple way. Instead of our usual dinner fare, Russ and I, along with my sister, travelled to small-town Nebraska to visit a steakhouse. Small towns can have some of the best food/atmosphere at times and we usually don't even recognize it. Actually, the place we visited really wasn't up there with being the best food or atmosphere, but it wasn't too bad. The food was great and the steaks were huge. And, my sister and I were both picturing the stare-down from the town's old farmers and residents who were lined up at the bar when we walked in the door. Yet, no such thing happened. It was just a nice time and a small road trip.
Monday, when I arrived home from school, there was a large box sitting in my living room. It was a Christmas gift that had come in the mail from my friend Kris! The thought is great in itself, but what was inside was even better. A Mr. Beer brewery kit! I'm so excited to even try, as I've always wondered about how to make beer or wine. Well, now I will be able to try, and that will be my new thing for the week (or longer, depending on the length of fermentation.)
So, we're off to a good start of the year. If anyone has any good ideas that I can pencil in as a future week's activity, feel free to let me know (note that Russ, my web-designer, has added our emails to the site). While we await paperwork, phone calls, or any news of our Caleb Wu, we'll do the best we can with the time we have now.

A Month in a Nutshell

It's been so busy this past month that I haven't had time to write anything. There isn't anything new to post on the adoption front because it's been the same story: we wait. We've had so much to do lately. I wouldn't say we haven't noticed that Caleb isn't here, but it all sure has made the wait go by more quickly. So, here is our last month in pictures:


The first part of December, we took our pickup truck to a local Christmas tree farm. It's an annual event, although the location of where the tree comes from usually changes every year. The weather of the day also pretty much changes every year, and this year it was sleet. It wasn't too bad, though. We got it home, set it up, and had it decorated by evening. Owen found it all very interesting.

We got a lot of snow this month, too. Pretty much every Saturday in the month of December brought a new layer. I had to take this picture of our driveway on one of the big days.

We managed to send a package to Wu, but I don't think it arrived in time for Christmas. Among the gifts we sent were a stuffed beagle and a onesie pictured here. We also sent candy for his caregivers, pictures of ourselves, our family, and Owen; toy cars; some clothes; and couple of disposable cameras. There is a small company that will send care packages to children in China who are awaiting families. Since we do not know the exact address of where Caleb Wu is, we can send it through this company who will get it to his foster family. We included in the package a letter requesting the family take some pictures of him with the disposable cameras so we can have them when we come to get him. And, the photo album we sent all had (translated) captions of each person, so hopefully he will at least see what his parents are going to look like.


Russ and I participated in a live nativity in front of our church for a couple of days before Christmas. One day, we were Joseph and Mary. It actually was a neat thing because, instead of camels and Magi and shepherds around us, we had every day people standing there (a Chrismas shopper, a single mom with kids, a homeless person, a student, etc). There is a lot of traffic during the 5 o'clock hour in front of our church. The goal was for people to see themselves somewhere in the mix of people looking at the Christ child, or maybe wonder where there would fit into it. It was kind of cool.

Our family threw a toddler shower for us and we received a lot of toys and clothes for Caleb Wu. It is now sitting here waiting for him, to be worn and played with.

And, we've been celebrating Christmas for the past two days. One of our favorite gifts was for Caleb that my brother-in-law made for us. This little shirt that says Made in China. We did receive so many nice things and it was a great couple of days. We are thankful for the blessings of family at Christmas and the hope of a new family for ourselves one day, too.
Merry Christmas!

Are we there yet?

Why is it that we seem to spend all of our lives trying to be somewhere else? Why be in such a huge rush to get to the next destination? I am so guilty of this. I always want to be ahead of where I am instead of enjoying the process. I am asked, frequently, about what I know or what news we have of Wu. At this point, the answer is, I don't know. And that will be the answer for a long time to come. And some days, it's OK, other days, not at all. I had been really looking forward to the holiday season because, typically, it passes very quickly because of busyness. But really, Thanksgiving was hard. The food was great, and it was a nice day, but something was missing. It was our boy. He was not there. And it hit me very hard that day.
But here's a question: instead of focusing only on what is missing, am I really just enjoying what time I have left before I become a parent? I'm free to sleep in or go to bed as late as I want with only my own consequences. I can go out, see movies, and watch whatever I want on TV (when Russ isn't around) instead of having to find a sitter, go to only G movies, or spend all my time watching The Wiggles. And, it's not every day, or year, or whatever, that I find myself planning an upcoming trip to China. It's pretty cool to think about.
I'm saying this because some days are really hard. Many people are so supportive, but they all want answers. Hey, I do, too, but I don't have any. We've been DTC since November 8th. I'm not anticipating hearing anything soon, and that's OK. One day, the mail will come and the answer will be there. We'll just be asking "are we there yet?" many more times in the mean time.
So, here's to enjoying the ride while we wait. We've been pretty busy with other stuff (hence the lack of a blog entry for about 3 weeks). Our Thanksgiving was pretty good and we are still finishing leftovers. My dog has recovered from a recent bout of kennel cough which had him on antibiotics and cough suppressants for 10 days. Our nursery is painted and the crib is here, although it has not been set up.
This weekend, depending on the weather, we will probably get our Christmas tree and try to put up some decorations. I think maybe we should have done some of this when it was 55 degrees instead of 33 and snowing like it is forecasted for Saturday. Maybe it will just mean building a fire, drinking eggnog, and breaking out my John Denver and the Muppets Christmas CD. I think that's a pretty good way to spend my time, too.