Yesssss!
I used to be pretty good at filling everyone in of what's been going on. But then, a few months ago, there was more to say. We had milestones and we made progress. The past couple of months have been mostly just waiting with not much new to report.
Until....
this week!
We received our travel approval this week! We are going! And, we're going soon! Suddenly, I don't feel ready. How can that be? Haven't I had more than enough time to prepare for this? It's true that things have been coming together, but it still feels like some things are still....out there. Unfinished. Incomplete. And they probably will never get done until absolutely necessary. I will still be reading parenting books on the plane ride over.
Here's what I think I'm mostly nervous about: he's a toddler. I can't escape some of the irony of the fact that I've spent 8 years working as a nurse for newborns, and yet I'm not getting one. I'm getting someone who is beyond my stage of understanding. I mean, I'm not totally clueless, but what exactly do toddlers do? I babysat my niece last week, who is a year older than Caleb, and it wasn't too bad. We put together the same puzzle 3 times. She helped me feed Owen, and then, when those first 12 minutes were over, we went to Home Depot because I didn't know what else to do. We spent a great deal of time checking out the carpet samples there and opening and closing every single drawer in the kitchen cabinet department seemed very entertaining. Is this my future?
It's going to be OK. As much as I have nerves, I also have a ton of excitement. And, of course, love for my little guy who I haven't even met yet. Life is seriously going to change. So what?
P.S. When I said we were leaving soon, I meant to say March 12th. As in, like, 12 days from today. I think I forgot to mention that part.
